Having hidden from the gay world for his whole life he was, at 75, like a teenager: anxious and excited to join, naive about all the cues of gay culture, and very susceptible to the emotional upheavals of new love. Even as he passed away five years later to cancer, he was energized, reaching out he wasn't in any way finished. Change, honesty, and openness can happen when it seems least likely. His hunger to completely change his life was confusing, painful, very funny, and deeply inspiring. He was 75 years old and had been married to my mother for 45 years.

' Beginners started when my father came out of the closet.